A VISIT TO THE PARK


I MET THIS WOMAN IN THE LOCAL PARK, SHE DIDN'T GIVE HER NAME,
WE GOT TALKING ABOUT WHAT WE'D NEVER HAD OR MISSED..
SHE SAID SHE STARTED HAVING SEX WHEN SHE WAS NEARLY SEVENTEEN
SHE DROPPED HER PANTS FOR ANYONE SHE KISSED

I SAID' DON'T YOU HAVE TO FANCY 'EM , TO LET THEM HAVE THEIR WAY,'
SHE SAID 'NOT IF YOU'RE STUCK IN'T RAIN WITHOUT A LIFT'.
'I'VE SHAGGED THEM FOR MY TAXI FARE AND FOR A CHINESE MEAL,
I'VE EVEN SHAGGED THEM WHEN THEY'RE COMING HOME OF'T NIGHT SHIFT
.
THERE WERE SOME THAT SHE REMEMBERED , SOME THAT SHE FORGOT,
THERE WERE SOME THAT WERE PHYSICALLY REPULSIVE,
SHE SAID SHE REGRETTED GOING WITH MARRIED MEN, AND SHE HATED ONE NIGHT STANDS
SHE DID ADMIT THAT IN HIND SIGHT SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN IMPULSIVE.

SHE TOLD ME SHE HAD NO REGRETS, THE GOOD OUT WEIGHED THE BAD,
SHE HAD FANTASTIC SEX, NO STRINGS ATTACHED
WHY SAVE YOURSELF FOR MARRIAGE LIKE SOME VILLAGE VESTAL VIRGIN,
WHILST HE'S SHAGGING OWT IN TIGHTS THAT HE CAN CATCH.

SAID I 'SO NO ONE MADE THE EARTH MOVE FOR YOU THEN,
NO MULTIPLE ORGASMS CAME YOUR WAY,'
SHE SAID, IF I'D HAVE WANTED EARTHQUAKES I'D HAVE GONE TO MOUNT VESUVIUS,
I SUPPOSE I'M LIKE CLINT EASTWOOD, NO ONE MADE MY DAY'.

I'VE NEVER DONE IT WHEN I'M WEARING VODKA GOGGLES,
I'VE REFUSED THEM IF THEY'RE OVER SIXTY FIVE,
I'VE NEVER HAD A GANG BANG EITHER BUT NOT FOR'T WANT A TRYING,
BUT I'VE STILL GOT TIME, I'M ONLY FIFTY FIVE.

I'D LIKE TO SAY THAT SHE LOOKED SEVENTY,
BUT SHE DIDN'T SHE LOOKED BRILLIANT I HAVE TO COMMENT.
SO I'VE DUSTBINNED ALL MY WRINKLE CREAMS UN EXPENSIVE MOISTURISERS,
COS IF THAT'S HOW NUNS BEHAVE, THEN I'M JOINING'T LOCAL CONVENT.

By Sheila Broadhead Betts.


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