THE BUST ENLARGER


I MUST HAVE BEEN ROUND'T CORNER , WHEN GOD HANDED OUT THE BOOBS,
CAUSE I'VE NEVER HAD A LOT ON TOP, THOUGH I ALWAYS ATE GOOD FOOD. ,
BUT MY BUST WERE NONE EXISTANT, I STUFFED MY BRA WITH COTTON WOOL,
I TRIED TO WALK WITH MY CHEST STUCK OUT, TILL IT GAVE MY BACK A PULL.
THEN ONE DAY I SAW THIS ADVERT, FOR A GENUINE BUST ENLARGER, ,
I KNEW I HAD TO HAVE ONE, AND DIDN'T CARE HOW MUCH THEY CHARGED YA.
I SCRIMPED AND SAVED FOR AGES, TO BUY THIS WONDERFUL MACHINE. ,
AND I FANTISISED ALL DAY AT WORK, I WAS IN A CONSTANT DREAM. ,
TILL FINALLY I'D SAVED ENOUGH FOR MY MIRACLE APPARATUS, ,
THOUGH I COULDN'T AFFORD TO MEND MY SHOES, ,
LEAST MY BUST WOULD BE OUTRAGIOUS. ,
WHEN I WENT THIS POSH ASSISTANT SEZ,'YES DEAR, CAN I HELP'. ,
BUT I WERE STRUCK DUMB WITH EMBARRASSMENT, SO JUST POINTED TO'T TOP SHELF,
WELL, SHE LOOKED AT SHELF, THEN DOWN AT ME,
AND WITH A VOICE THAT ECHOED ROUND,
'A BUST ENLARGER MADAM' ,
THERE YOU ARE, THAT'S JUST THREE POUND'
WELL I WANTED FLOOR TO OPEN UP AND SWALLOW ME THERE AND THEN, ,
BUT I PAID THREE QUID AND SCARPERED PAST ALL THE GAPING MEN. ,
BAC K HOME I RUSHED TO'T BATHROOM, ,
MY NEW TOY TO THEN PLUG IN. ,
MY MIND WERE FIXED ON 'C' CUP BRAS , ,
AND CLEAVAGES AND THINGS. ,
I SPENT THAT LONG IN'T BATHROOM, ,
MY DAD WONDERED WHAT WAS UP, ,
BUT I'D SWORN MY MAM TO SECRECY,
SO SHE KEPT HER MOUTH TIGHT SHUT. ,
THE HOURS I SPENT GYRATING, ,
WITH THIS THING STRAPPED TO MY CHEST. ,
BUT I PERSEVERED BELIEVING, ,
WITH BIG BOOBS I WOULD BE BLESSED. ,
EVERYDAY I TOOK MY MEASUREMENTS, ,
BUT THEY WERE ALWAYS THIRTY TWO, ,
TILL ONE DAY IN DESPERATION, ,
I CHUCKED THE BLOODY THING DOWN'T LOO.
AYE! I THREW AWAY THAT DAFT MACHGINE,
BECAUSE IT DIDN'T FULFILL MY NEEDS,
THOUGH IT DIDN'T DO MY BUST MUCH GOOD,
I'D BIGGEST NIPPLES IN ALL LEEDS,



Poems that I did for Liz dawn       Home